Pigs Fly! Cows Come Home! Cthulu Stirs! The Duke lives!

[frigidmagi]

Nuke'em!

To paraphrase Mark Twain, there are lies, damned lies, and Duke Nukem Forever stories. The game's been vaporware for over a decade. Leaked screens and gameplay videos from so-called alpha versions occasionally emerge then fade in a muddle of half-baked theories, forum mockery, and fan dismay. When the game's now defunct publisher 3D Realms talk about the game these days, few listen.

Until today, that is.

Yesterday 3D Realms president George Broussard teased gamers with a picture of pigs flying. (In a 2006 1UP interview, Broussard joked the game would be out when pigs flew.) Today, he's explaining what that means. Or at least the game's new developer is.

At PAX Prime 2010, Gearbox (Brothers in Arms, Borderlands) president Randy Pitchford confirmed rumors that his studio has assumed responsibility for the practically mothballed shooter. What's more, he announced it'll be playable--that's right, playable--on the show floor.
"People seem to be enjoying the game a lot," reads a dispatch from 2K Games' Twitter feed. "How many [PAX] folks thought they'd leave Seattle having played [Duke Nukem Forever]?"

The game, due in 2011, will be available simultaneously for Xbox 360, PlayStation 3, and Microsoft Windows.

"Duke Nukem, the interactive entertainment industry's most irreverent and quoted character of all time, will bring his signature brand of babe-lovin', cigar-smoking, beer-chugging and ass-kicking action as he once again saves the Earth and our babes from hordes of invading aliens," wrote 2K Games in a press statement. "In other shocking news, Duke Nukem Forever will be playable right now for all attendees 17 and older of this year's Penny Arcade Expo at the 2K Booth...giving the first hands-on experience with the game that was originally announced during the tail end of the Clinton Administration."

"All great things take time... a lot of time," said 2K president Christoph Hartmann. "After a hiatus from the video game world, Duke Nukem is back and better than ever. The return of the King from the glory days of shooters will satisfy our patient, die-hard fans, as well as a new generation of bubble gum-chewing, flat top and shades-wearing bad-asses."
"Make no mistake about it--Duke Nukem Forever is a testament to the era of when shooters were bodacious and fun."

It's been so long I don't remember how the last one ended, but I do remember the multiplayer matches with freeze-rays, shrink-guns, and the helpless terror of a gigantic boot filling my CRT. In DNF, it sounds like the alien pig cops and titanic bosses are back, along with plenty of profanity and anatomical ogling.

"This game puts pedal to the metal and tongue firmly in cheek, among other places," reads 2K's description. "Shoot hoops, lift weights, read adult magazines, draw crude messages on whiteboards or ogle one of the many beautiful women that populate Duke's life; that is if you can pull yourself away long enough from kicking ass and taking names."

If anyone can pull it off, well--Gearbox isn't faultless when it comes to game design, but they're light years ahead of 3D Realms. Kudos to George Broussard and company for finally stepping aside.

Armageddon has surely grown closer!

[Dark Silver]

I'll top that.

They found a baby Mi-go off the coast of Japan.....


But yes, DNF is finally being released. I thought it not in my lifetime.....

[Hotfoot]

we gonna start a pool to see how bad it will suck?

[rhoenix]

...What heresy is this? What bespeaks the Nameless One's name?

Seriously, I'm kinda FPS'ed out at this point, unless it has an evolving interface (a la Mass Effect). I'm not sure I can do more except shrug at this point.

Duke Nukem 3D gave me many good memories. However, those days have passed.

[LadyTevar]

it's true

Babes, bullets, bombs! Duke Nukem is making a comeback
By Winda Benedetti

Just as Duke Nukem – the one-time king of shooting games – seemed destined for permanent retirement if not the warm embrace of death itself, Gearbox Software and 2K Games surprised the gaming world Friday by announcing that the action hero and icon will soon wield his over-the-top guns and attitude yet again.

After more than a decade of delays, "Duke Nukem Forever" will debut on the PS3, Xbox 360 and PC game systems in 2011.

And just to prove the news is for real, publisher 2K made playable demos of the game available to video game fans at the Penny Arcade Expo Friday.

"Duke Nukem Forever" was first announced more than a decade ago – in 1997. But Gearbox and 2K confirmed rumors of the franchise's return Friday morning as the annual expo was opening its doors to thousands of video game fans. As news spread, gamers formed massive lines around an enormous booth hung with pictures of the Duke

"All great things take time … a lot of time," Christoph Hartmann, president of 2K, said in a statement. "After a hiatus from the video game world, Duke Nukem is back and better than ever. The return of the King from the glory days of shooters will satisfy our patient, die-hard fans, as well as a new generation of bubble gum-chewing, flat top and shades-wearing bad-asses."

Duke Nukem got his start way back in 1991 as the star of an MS-DOS platforming shooter game by the same name. He rapidly gained fame (and infamy) with "Duke Nukem II" in 1993 and "Duke Nukem 3D" in 1996 and a variety of spinoffs titles after that. The mouthy, macho (some might even say sexist) Duke became an iconic gaming figure thanks in part to his penchant for colorful/off-color lines like: "My boot, your face; the perfect couple," and " Your ass is grass and I've got the weed-whacker," and, of course, "Babes, bullets, bombs. Damn - I love this job!"

After being announced in 1997, "Duke Nukem Forever" (a sequel to "Duke Nukem 3D") had seemed to languish in a never-ending development cycle at 3D Realms (the franchise's creator). When 3D Realms closed up shop in 2009, many wondered whether the world would ever see the Duke's enormous biceps again. Adding to the complications, publisher Take-Two Interactive ended up suing the developer for its continued delays in delivering the game. The case was settled this May and "Duke Nukem Forever" has now been given a new life at Gearbox Software (the development company behind the excellent game "Borderlands").

So why all the delays on 3D Realms' part? Scott Miller, then owner and CEO of 3D Realms, told the Wall Street Journal, "We were probably too much of a perfectionist about the game. When some other game had some great feature come out we wanted to match it." And he added, “We’d been distracted on other games like 'Prey.' It was a combination of those things. We were trying to build a game that was too great."

The new Duke promises to be as raucous and raunchy as ever with the 2K and Gearbox news release describing the long-awaited sequel thusly:

Pig cops, alien shrink rays and enormous alien bosses won’t stop our hero from accomplishing his one and only goal: to save the world, save the babes and to be a bad-ass while doing it. The King of All Shooters is back with over-the-top weapons, massive aliens and unprecedented levels of interactivity. This game puts pedal to the metal and tongue firmly in cheek, among other places. Shoot hoops, lift weights, read adult magazines, draw crude messages on whiteboards or ogle one of the many beautiful women that populate Duke’s life; that is if you can pull yourself away long enough from kicking ass and taking names

As the Duke himself would say, "Hail to the king, baby!"

[Mayabird]

I'm not going to believe it until people are playing the actual game and confirming that when they load the DVD it's more than just a white screen with a line drawing of a penis and text reading "I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU STILL FELL FOR IT!"

Also that baby mi-go looks like a sea anemone that was pulled off its rock.