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#1 Have you accepted Zeus as your Lord and Saviour?

Posted: Wed Nov 14, 2007 4:12 pm
by Norseman
Well have you?

If not it's not too late read this tract, followed by Hesiod, the Iliad, and the Odyssey.

You might also try Mithraism, after all Mithra's saves, and that's no bull!

P.S. Yes the theology here is a bit wonky, for one Zeus didn't judge the souls of the dead.

#2

Posted: Wed Nov 14, 2007 4:14 pm
by Dark Silver
I prefer Hepheastus as my personal Lord and Savoir....

at least he's banging Aphrodite instead of Hera...

#3

Posted: Wed Nov 14, 2007 7:52 pm
by frigidmagi
at least he's banging Aphrodite instead of Hera...
So is Aries, and Hermes and... Well it would be a shorter list on who isn't banging the damn faithless slut.

#4

Posted: Wed Nov 14, 2007 8:00 pm
by Batman
The greek pantheon sure wasn't big on monogamy. But then, it includes Zeus so...
And there's no I in Ares. Sorry. Batman.

#5

Posted: Wed Nov 14, 2007 8:02 pm
by Charon
*looks at name of user, looks at thread title, looks back at username.*

BLASPHEMER!

#6

Posted: Wed Nov 14, 2007 8:04 pm
by Batman
World's Greatest Detective or not I think you lost me.

#7

Posted: Wed Nov 14, 2007 8:53 pm
by Dark Silver
Norseman

Thread asking if you've accepted Zeus.....who is Greek.....


you do the math "Worlds Greatest Detective"

#8

Posted: Wed Nov 14, 2007 9:21 pm
by Batman
There's approximately 13 billion ways I can explain why there's no actual connection between those two but-my bad? :oops:
Hey I'm CANONICALLY a complete and utter moron.

#9

Posted: Thu Nov 15, 2007 1:24 am
by SirNitram
frigidmagi wrote:
at least he's banging Aphrodite instead of Hera...
So is Aries, and Hermes and... Well it would be a shorter list on who isn't banging the damn faithless slut.
That's easy. Hephaetus, her husband, is not banging said faithless slut.

It sucks being the foundry-god.

#10

Posted: Thu Nov 15, 2007 7:05 am
by Dark Silver
neither is Zeus

or Hera......

though I'm pretty certain Athena is all up in that....

#11

Posted: Thu Nov 15, 2007 7:11 am
by frigidmagi
That is a vile slander upon the Grey Eyed Lady. Athena was defined as a goddess with intelligence and taste. That's why she wasn't sleeping with any of the gods or goddesses.

#12

Posted: Thu Nov 15, 2007 7:15 am
by Dark Silver
Fine fine....I could be mistaken...

it could be Artemis.....

I know Persephone was a frigid bitch though...

#13

Posted: Thu Nov 15, 2007 7:45 am
by frigidmagi
You be pissy to if you had to spend half the year with fucking Hades and then the rest of it with your damn mother!

#14

Posted: Thu Nov 15, 2007 1:54 pm
by Lord Iames Osari
And it wasn't Artemis. She was a goddess of maidenhood, IIRC. Didn't she kill a guy just for stumbling across her while she was bathing in a pond?

#15

Posted: Thu Nov 15, 2007 1:55 pm
by Dark Silver
no

She turned him into a dear and set her hunting dogs on him.

She would never sully her hands with something like the blood of a mere mortal

#16

Posted: Thu Nov 15, 2007 7:48 pm
by Comrade Tortoise
frigidmagi wrote:That is a vile slander upon the Grey Eyed Lady. Athena was defined as a goddess with intelligence and taste. That's why she wasn't sleeping with any of the gods or goddesses.
Additionally, she would NEVER sleep with someone who disguises himself as a "golden shower" or cuttlefish to impregnate a mortal. Moreover who she had to burst out of because he ate her while she was a fetus.