LibriumArcana.Games

A man went to heaven, and an angel greeted him there. She escorted him to a room full of clocks. "What are all the clocks for?"
The angel replied "There's a clock for every person on Earth. Each time someone lies, their clock advances."
The man looked around and noticed that one of the clocks had not moved at all.
He said, "What about that clock? It hasn't moved at all."
The angel said, "That's Mother Theresa's clock."
She pointed out another clock that had only moved a little bit and said, "That's George Washington's clock; he only lied a few times."
Then the man asked, "Where's George Bush's clock?"
To this the angel replied, "Jesus keeps it in his office...he uses it as a fan."

Speaking of heaven:

A Unitarian died and went to heaven. St Peter greeted him at the pearly gates, and said "Welcome to heaven! I'm sure you'll enjoy your stay here for all eternity; the UUs are currently having a big party and group orgy in room 275. It's that way down at the end of the hall; feel free to drop in and ask if you have any questions."

The UU was like, "Cool!", and started down the hall. After a few steps, St Peter said, "Wait a sec; I forgot to mention something."

The UU stopped. "What?"

St Peter: "Be sure to be extra-quiety when you go by room 77."

"Why?"

"That's where all the Baptists are. They think they're the only ones here."

lol that's a good ones Surly... room 77 eh?