#1 Revenge of the Oscars: All-White Edition
Posted: Sun Feb 28, 2016 8:00 pm
With no minorities in evidence except for the host, it's time for...
General Havoc's Oscar Liveblog, VOLUME FOUR!!!
Let's do this:
Running Score:
Accurate Predictions by the genius-in-residence: 8
Pushes: 11
Criminal Travesties Against Nature and God: 6
Best Original Screenplay:
Who should have won: Spotlight. Straight Outta Compton was a better film, but had script issues due to one of the producers being Dr. Dre.
Who actually won: Spotlight. Excellent start, Oscars. Well selected
Best Adapted Screenplay:
Who should have won: The Martian. Admittedly the only one I saw, but a superb adaptation of a book.
Who actually won: The Big Short. I didn't see it, but others who did reported liking it quite a bit.
Best Supporting Actress:
Who should have won: Jennifer Jason Leigh. A staggering performance in The Hateful Eight.
Who actually won: Alicia Vikander. I didn't see The Danish Girl, though I heard poor things.
Best Production Design:
Who should have won: Mad Max: Fury Road. How could it be anyone else?
Who actually won: Mad Max: Fury Road. Aha! At least they get something!
Best Costume Design:
Who should have won: Mad Max: Fury Road. Superb visual storytelling in the form of costuming and props.
Who actually won: Mad Max: Fury Road. And it appears that someone actually agrees with me.
Best Hairstyling/Makeup:
Who should have won: Mad Max: Fury Road. This isn't even close.
Who actually won: Mad Max: Fury Road. Three for Three so far!
Best Cinematography:
Who should have won: Mad Max: Fury Road. How could it possibly be anything else?!
Who actually won: The Revenant. NO! Bullshit! Flag on the play! Mad Max had some of the best cinematography I've ever seen!
Best Editing:
Who should have won: Star Wars: The Force Awakens. A really close one here, but the editing in Force Awakens was good enough for me to notice.
Who actually won: Mad Max: Fury Road. I have absolutely no objections here.
Best Sound Editing:
Who should have won: Mad Max: Fury Road. The Sound was part of the storytelling in this one.
Who actually won: Mad Max: Fury Road. Fuck yes. At least the Academy is able to recognize this much.
Best Sound Mixing:
Who should have won: Mad Max: Fury Road. It takes skill to turn a frenetic chaos-chase like this film into something intelligible.
Who actually won: Mad Max: Fury Road. Goddamn, Mad Max is cleaning up the technical awards tonight.
Best Visual Effects:
Who should have won: Star Wars: The Force Awakens. Another really close one between it and Mad Max, but I have to give it to the return of Star Wars.
Who actually won: Ex Machina. WHAT?! FUCK no! Ex Machina was a perfectly decent film, but barely had any effects at all in it relative to the juggernauts!
Best Animated Feature:
Who should have won: Anomalisa. I'm not really sold on any of the nominees to be honest, but I caught this one on the flip side, and it was quite good.
Who actually won: Inside Out. No surprise here, and I can't really get mad.
Best Animated Short:
Who should have won: Sanjay's Super Team. Pixar's offering was best of the lot, as per usual.
Who actually won: Bear Story. Oh that is some BULLSHIT. Bear Story was the worst of the (admittedly decent) lot!
Best Supporting Actor:
Who should have won: Sylvester Stallone. This was a real wake-up reminder for everyone as to just how good Stallone is in his iconic role.
Who actually won: Mark Rylance. You know... I'm actually okay with this one. Rylance was without question the best thing in Bridge of Spies.
Best Documentary Short Subject:
Who should have won: No idea. Didn't see them.
Who actually won: The Girl in the River. Good on them.
Best Documentary Feature:
Who should have won: I have no idea. I didn't see the documentaries on offer this year.
Who actually won: Amy. I've actually heard really good things about this one.
Best Short Film:
Who should have won: Stutterer. An exceedingly weak field, but I have to give it to this one.
Who actually won: Stutterer. I'm actually kind of shocked at this one. Maybe the Academy was as sick as I was of the downers.
Best Foreign Language Film:
Who should have won: No clue. All the foreign films I saw last year with the exception of the un-nominated Connection were utter shit.
Who actually won: Son of Saul. I've heard good things about this one. I might catch it later.
Best Original Score:
Who should have won: Star Wars: The Force Awakens. A narrow one for me over Hateful Eight, but it's John Freaking Williams!
Who actually won: The Hateful Eight. Ennio Morricone wins his first Oscar. I can't complain.
Best Original Song:
Who should have won: No idea. All the songs I heard sucked horribly. I'd give no award.
Who actually won: Writing's On the Wall. Fuck that. This song sucked miserably. Any of the others would have been better.
Best Director:
Who should have won: George Miller. Mad Max was his Magnum Opus. It deserves to be recognized as such.
Who actually won: Alejandro Gonzalez Innaritu. Horseshit. Miller deserved to walk away with this one. Innaritu is a wannabe Terrence Mallick who hates Superhero movies and the people who like them. Only a little bitter.
Best Actress:
Who should have won: I have no idea. I actually didn't see most of these films, and the one I did (Joy) did not deserve to have Oscars awarded.
Who actually won: Brie Larson. Room was a movie I had no interest in seeing. Still, good for her.
Best Actor:
Who should have won: Leonardo di Caprio. I know that people are sick of hearing about him and I know it was transparent Oscar-bait, but so be it, his performance was deserving.
Who actually won: Leonardo di Caprio. I'll be goddamned. The Academy finally let him out of the woods.
Best Picture:
Who should have won: Mad Max: Fury Road. It stands no chance of winning, but it was hands-down the best movie of the year.
Who actually won: Spotlight. I... honestly don't know what to say about this one. No, Spotlight was not the best movie of the year, but... it's not a TERRIBLE pick. I'm gonna call this one a wash.
General Havoc's Oscar Liveblog, VOLUME FOUR!!!
Let's do this:
Running Score:
Accurate Predictions by the genius-in-residence: 8
Pushes: 11
Criminal Travesties Against Nature and God: 6
Best Original Screenplay:
Who should have won: Spotlight. Straight Outta Compton was a better film, but had script issues due to one of the producers being Dr. Dre.
Who actually won: Spotlight. Excellent start, Oscars. Well selected
Best Adapted Screenplay:
Who should have won: The Martian. Admittedly the only one I saw, but a superb adaptation of a book.
Who actually won: The Big Short. I didn't see it, but others who did reported liking it quite a bit.
Best Supporting Actress:
Who should have won: Jennifer Jason Leigh. A staggering performance in The Hateful Eight.
Who actually won: Alicia Vikander. I didn't see The Danish Girl, though I heard poor things.
Best Production Design:
Who should have won: Mad Max: Fury Road. How could it be anyone else?
Who actually won: Mad Max: Fury Road. Aha! At least they get something!
Best Costume Design:
Who should have won: Mad Max: Fury Road. Superb visual storytelling in the form of costuming and props.
Who actually won: Mad Max: Fury Road. And it appears that someone actually agrees with me.
Best Hairstyling/Makeup:
Who should have won: Mad Max: Fury Road. This isn't even close.
Who actually won: Mad Max: Fury Road. Three for Three so far!
Best Cinematography:
Who should have won: Mad Max: Fury Road. How could it possibly be anything else?!
Who actually won: The Revenant. NO! Bullshit! Flag on the play! Mad Max had some of the best cinematography I've ever seen!
Best Editing:
Who should have won: Star Wars: The Force Awakens. A really close one here, but the editing in Force Awakens was good enough for me to notice.
Who actually won: Mad Max: Fury Road. I have absolutely no objections here.
Best Sound Editing:
Who should have won: Mad Max: Fury Road. The Sound was part of the storytelling in this one.
Who actually won: Mad Max: Fury Road. Fuck yes. At least the Academy is able to recognize this much.
Best Sound Mixing:
Who should have won: Mad Max: Fury Road. It takes skill to turn a frenetic chaos-chase like this film into something intelligible.
Who actually won: Mad Max: Fury Road. Goddamn, Mad Max is cleaning up the technical awards tonight.
Best Visual Effects:
Who should have won: Star Wars: The Force Awakens. Another really close one between it and Mad Max, but I have to give it to the return of Star Wars.
Who actually won: Ex Machina. WHAT?! FUCK no! Ex Machina was a perfectly decent film, but barely had any effects at all in it relative to the juggernauts!
Best Animated Feature:
Who should have won: Anomalisa. I'm not really sold on any of the nominees to be honest, but I caught this one on the flip side, and it was quite good.
Who actually won: Inside Out. No surprise here, and I can't really get mad.
Best Animated Short:
Who should have won: Sanjay's Super Team. Pixar's offering was best of the lot, as per usual.
Who actually won: Bear Story. Oh that is some BULLSHIT. Bear Story was the worst of the (admittedly decent) lot!
Best Supporting Actor:
Who should have won: Sylvester Stallone. This was a real wake-up reminder for everyone as to just how good Stallone is in his iconic role.
Who actually won: Mark Rylance. You know... I'm actually okay with this one. Rylance was without question the best thing in Bridge of Spies.
Best Documentary Short Subject:
Who should have won: No idea. Didn't see them.
Who actually won: The Girl in the River. Good on them.
Best Documentary Feature:
Who should have won: I have no idea. I didn't see the documentaries on offer this year.
Who actually won: Amy. I've actually heard really good things about this one.
Best Short Film:
Who should have won: Stutterer. An exceedingly weak field, but I have to give it to this one.
Who actually won: Stutterer. I'm actually kind of shocked at this one. Maybe the Academy was as sick as I was of the downers.
Best Foreign Language Film:
Who should have won: No clue. All the foreign films I saw last year with the exception of the un-nominated Connection were utter shit.
Who actually won: Son of Saul. I've heard good things about this one. I might catch it later.
Best Original Score:
Who should have won: Star Wars: The Force Awakens. A narrow one for me over Hateful Eight, but it's John Freaking Williams!
Who actually won: The Hateful Eight. Ennio Morricone wins his first Oscar. I can't complain.
Best Original Song:
Who should have won: No idea. All the songs I heard sucked horribly. I'd give no award.
Who actually won: Writing's On the Wall. Fuck that. This song sucked miserably. Any of the others would have been better.
Best Director:
Who should have won: George Miller. Mad Max was his Magnum Opus. It deserves to be recognized as such.
Who actually won: Alejandro Gonzalez Innaritu. Horseshit. Miller deserved to walk away with this one. Innaritu is a wannabe Terrence Mallick who hates Superhero movies and the people who like them. Only a little bitter.
Best Actress:
Who should have won: I have no idea. I actually didn't see most of these films, and the one I did (Joy) did not deserve to have Oscars awarded.
Who actually won: Brie Larson. Room was a movie I had no interest in seeing. Still, good for her.
Best Actor:
Who should have won: Leonardo di Caprio. I know that people are sick of hearing about him and I know it was transparent Oscar-bait, but so be it, his performance was deserving.
Who actually won: Leonardo di Caprio. I'll be goddamned. The Academy finally let him out of the woods.
Best Picture:
Who should have won: Mad Max: Fury Road. It stands no chance of winning, but it was hands-down the best movie of the year.
Who actually won: Spotlight. I... honestly don't know what to say about this one. No, Spotlight was not the best movie of the year, but... it's not a TERRIBLE pick. I'm gonna call this one a wash.