A fundie's dating guide

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Kreshna Aryaguna Nurzaman
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#1 A fundie's dating guide

Post by Kreshna Aryaguna Nurzaman »

Basically, it's nothing more than a typical fundie dating guide; strong emphasizes on abstinence, slippery slope fallacy, etc. However, I couldn't help but laughing my ass hard when reading this one part:
When God sees that your desire is to please Him, He’s able to pump extra strength into you to stand up under the pressure. It comes from the Holy Spirit — and to be honest, guys, I don’t think it’s possible to withstand sexual pressure without His strength!
All the writer needs is replacing the words 'stand up' with 'erect', and everything will come into place. :lol:
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So be it. If saying "NO" means being alone, then to hell with love, with romance, with marriage, and all the shit life keeps pumping at me. I'll walk alone, but with freedom and a healed pride.

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#2

Post by Lindar »

KAN!*swats playfully* That was naughty!

Naughty KAN naughty!

no more bunnies for you.

although i never would have thought of changing the words...


why were your eading a fundie dating guide anyway?
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#3

Post by Kreshna Aryaguna Nurzaman »

Lindar wrote:KAN!*swats playfully* That was naughty!

Naughty KAN naughty!

no more bunnies for you.

although i never would have thought of changing the words...


why were your eading a fundie dating guide anyway?
*speaks with low voice* Because I'm actually a fundie! But please don't let others know. By the way, would you believe me if I told you I'm still a virgin? Now if you excuse me, I have abstinence to maintain. :razz:
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Share your free D&D character here.

:welcome :arrow: :sheepfucker: :thumbsup

So be it. If saying "NO" means being alone, then to hell with love, with romance, with marriage, and all the shit life keeps pumping at me. I'll walk alone, but with freedom and a healed pride.

NEVER buy a LiteOn CD/DVD Writer. Ever.
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#4

Post by Mayabird »

It reminds me of my cousin's wedding. Southern Baptists. They spent the entire thing talking about how it was going to be a three-way marriage between the two of them and Jesus. My brother and I were giving each other sideways glances and whispering, "Are they really talking about a threesome with Jesus?"
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#5

Post by ImpishAngel »

"I mean I love Jesus'' /cartman
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#6

Post by Ace Pace »


3. He’s convinced that if God is invited in on the whole process, He’ll show him how to have real success with females.



Though the media and friends will say you need to change, I think you can stick with one standard—as long as you have the desire to please God above yourself and your friends.

:lol: !
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#7

Post by Discombobulated »

Mayabird wrote:It reminds me of my cousin's wedding. Southern Baptists. They spent the entire thing talking about how it was going to be a three-way marriage between the two of them and Jesus. My brother and I were giving each other sideways glances and whispering, "Are they really talking about a threesome with Jesus?"
Hee heee! I love it.

This guide is pretty entertaining. I wonder if any guys actually listen to this? I could see a teenaged girl restraining herself from physical contact more easily than a teenaged guy.
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#8

Post by The Cleric »

More than half of the women I've been with have initiated the "sexual contact".
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#9

Post by Josh »

The Cleric wrote:More than half of the women I've been with have initiated the "sexual contact".
Hush you. Everyone knows that Godly women don't enjoy sex.

Oh, wait.

Never mind.
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#10

Post by B4UTRUST »

Petrosjko wrote:Hush you. Everyone knows that Godly women don't enjoy sex.
Says the man who obviously has never raided the all girl's catholic school :wink:
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#11

Post by Lindar »

B4UTRUST wrote:
Petrosjko wrote:Hush you. Everyone knows that Godly women don't enjoy sex.
Says the man who obviously has never raided the all girl's catholic school :wink:
:shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock:

You raided the all girl school???
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#12

Post by Josh »

B4UTRUST wrote:
Petrosjko wrote:Hush you. Everyone knows that Godly women don't enjoy sex.
Says the man who obviously has never raided the all girl's catholic school :wink:
I never had to raid. I just had to stand outside and wave, then survive the swarm of amor. :wink:
When the Frog God smiles, arm yourself.
"'Flammable' and 'inflammable' have the same meaning! This language is insane!"
GIVE ME COFFEE AND I WILL ALLOW YOU TO LIVE!- Frigid
"Ork 'as no automatic code o' survival. 'is partic'lar distinction from all udda livin' gits is tha necessity ta act inna face o' alternatives by means o' dakka."
I created the sound of madness, wrote the book on pain
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