Feedback for Cynical Cat

frigidmagi · Post by **frigidmagi** » Wed Mar 26, 2008 2:03 pm

Calm down Cat, you're being abusive over bad editing habits.

Tev, he's right in that it would help if you would give the sentence and where it would fall in the story. Something sentence "so and so" in the third paragraph down.

Rogue 9 · Post by **Rogue 9** » Thu Mar 27, 2008 3:20 pm

Fascinating.

Anyhee:

"Have you finished planning your assassination yet?" it asked.

"Don't you already no?"

"Don't you already know?" is what I believe you're searching for.

LadyTevar · Post by **LadyTevar** » Wed Apr 02, 2008 9:45 pm

Hurrah! More of Exalted Slave!

And a minor typo:

They waited until the dead of knight

I think you foreshadowed that one too well

There are so many rewards for the faithful.

Does that include your faithful readers?

LadyTevar · Post by **LadyTevar** » Thu Apr 03, 2008 9:42 am

Typos again, m'dear

They were mails

Mail is armor. Males have balls. ;)

opening a gauge

I think you mean gouge.

And you've given me yet another new sig-quote.

Or maybe I should let Nitram have it, since it fits his attitude better.

frigidmagi · Post by **frigidmagi** » Thu Apr 03, 2008 11:57 am

Tev, Cat does have a point, you need to give him more information about where these typos are. Like which paragraph would be nice.

LadyTevar · Post by **LadyTevar** » Thu Apr 03, 2008 12:23 pm

If this was like SDnet, I could open a 'quick post' and cut&paste the phrases as I come to them. As it is, I have to open a WordPad or something, then transfer it all over into this thread.

If this is really not that helpful, then I'll stop doing it.

Cynical Cat · Post by **Cynical Cat** » Thu Apr 03, 2008 6:23 pm

Whole sentence is the minimum. If you're not going to do that, then don't bother.

LadyTevar · Post by **LadyTevar** » Thu Apr 03, 2008 8:57 pm

As I said, it's a little difficult with this board set up as a separate sub-section to catch the typos properly, and when there's several of them Cut&Paste isn't that helpful.

Read through the chapter backwards from the bottom of the page next time. I find that causes typos to jump out screaming and allows you to correct them before posting.

frigidmagi · Post by **frigidmagi** » Fri Apr 04, 2008 6:52 am

When I want to do something like that, I open an notebook doc and copy+paste.

Cynical Cat · Post by **Cynical Cat** » Fri Apr 04, 2008 10:35 am

LadyTevar wrote: Read through the chapter backwards from the bottom of the page next time. I find that causes typos to jump out screaming and allows you to correct them before posting.

I do not carefully check these. If I did, it would be days between posts because I edit very poorly when the page is still warm. The whole point of doing this originally was to overcome my reluctance with people seeing my work raw and not massively reworked and polished (which meant almost never), which used to be a huge difficulty with me.

This isn't commercial work. It's purpose is to entertain and to get me more comfortable showing my writing to others.

LadyTevar · Post by **LadyTevar** » Sat Apr 05, 2008 1:02 pm

"Oh Elvarra. You have chosen so terribly wrong," he whispered. There was regret and sorrow in his voice and a terrible, merciless fury.

Kaeryn would almost feel sorry for Elvarra, since they're in similar positions. The difference is Kaeryn didn't fuck up this badly, so she'll get to survive a very years longer. Elvarra will be lucky to make it out of the manse.

LadyTevar · Post by **LadyTevar** » Mon Apr 07, 2008 4:21 pm

Yes! Save the Cats!

Short but sweet, hon.

LadyTevar · Post by **LadyTevar** » Tue Apr 08, 2008 11:05 am

How the blazes does Wither know where it is?! Did s/he find out in the last timeline?

This is getting good, hon. Very very good. Gimme more.

Cynical Cat · Post by **Cynical Cat** » Tue Apr 08, 2008 11:07 am

LadyTevar wrote:How the blazes does Wither know where it is?! Did s/he find out in the last timeline?

Yes.

frigidmagi · Post by **frigidmagi** » Tue Apr 08, 2008 11:24 am

I know where it is

Scariest Five Words Yet.

Cynical Cat · Post by **Cynical Cat** » Tue Apr 08, 2008 11:57 am

As for the next installment: THERE WILL BE BLOOD!

(couldn't resist)

LadyTevar · Post by **LadyTevar** » Tue Apr 08, 2008 12:11 pm

Of course you know it just adds to my theory that Wither is Nalifan.

Cynical Cat · Post by **Cynical Cat** » Tue Apr 08, 2008 12:49 pm

LadyTevar wrote:Of course you know it just adds to my theory that Wither is Nalifan.

Well, it certainly isn't contradictory evidence.

Of course it doesn't contradict Wither's story of being one of Nalifan's enemies who eventually killed him, took his secrets, and then carefully plotted a time intervention to change history.

LadyTevar · Post by **LadyTevar** » Tue Apr 08, 2008 1:48 pm

Cynical Cat wrote:
LadyTevar wrote:Of course you know it just adds to my theory that Wither is Nalifan.
Well, it certainly isn't contradictory evidence.

Of course it doesn't contradict Wither's story of being one of Nalifan's enemies who eventually killed him, took his secrets, and then carefully plotted a time intervention to change history.

This is also true. We'll have to wait and see what crumbs you drop in the next chapter, won't we?

LadyTevar · Post by **LadyTevar** » Tue Apr 08, 2008 8:18 pm

YES! The Fight begins, and the odds aren't looking that good for the home team. I can't wait to see how its' handled.

Now ... Ylafen. Young, powerful warmage. Thinks power alone can win over cunning and skill. Soon to find out otherwise in a very painful matter, I'm sure, which would make him a good candidate for Wither.

Rogue 9 · Post by **Rogue 9** » Wed Apr 09, 2008 6:18 am

I doubt it. Time paradoxes are tricky, but I'm pretty sure Wither's more likely to be someone who was killed in something unrelated to House Desanna, because if it weren't for Wither's interference in the first place, Ylafen wouldn't have been there to be killed.

LadyTevar · Post by **LadyTevar** » Mon Apr 14, 2008 12:14 pm

One typo:

Since they don't have remote control over their traps, they won't know that we've made a whole.

Scutter and Blades together? Hehehehhe... who's in charge?

LadyTevar · Post by **LadyTevar** » Tue Apr 15, 2008 11:56 am

.......... Un-Holy-Fuck.

This is one of the nastier traps they've been in... I can't wait to see how Nal gets them out of it.

Hopefully not as corpses. I don't think he'll trust Kaeryn to Resurrect people this time.

LadyTevar · Post by **LadyTevar** » Tue Apr 15, 2008 6:47 pm

Where did Fadina get the mask? She had a master she learned under..........

Cynical Cat · Post by **Cynical Cat** » Tue Apr 15, 2008 6:49 pm

LadyTevar wrote:Where did Fadina get the mask? She had a master she learned under..........

She made it herself. Of course, where she got the lore is another story . . .

LibriumArcana.Games

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